July 2000
My Dear,
Once again the clock is not my friend. How slow the time passes on this the first Friday night that we are not together since our declaration of love more than a month ago. Since that date I haven’t felt the need to write, but the anguish of this lonely night prompts me to do so now.
It was a tedious week past, marked with pain in the form of unquenched
desire, blooming flowers, and your physical discomfort that wrenched my heart. It pained me so to see you suffering. Though it did set me free to comfort you, and care for you more than I usually allow myself during the normal course of the day, and how I cherished each additional exchange. I now have a small sense of what you must have been feeling all those many times you had to stand by and watch when I was hurting.
The days now blend one into the other, spanning the time until we can be alone together once again. How I wish I could slow the hands of time when we have only each other. I try and tell myself to be grateful for the time that we do have for it is much more than the dream we each shared alone before.
But being with you is intoxicating, always leaving me wanting more. I dream of the day when time is suspended, only ours to share, with no clock to toll the dreaded hour. I long to linger in your embrace until the sun rises. Until then my dear, I will recall the sweet memories we have created together to soothe my mind and my body. One day, time will be on our side, please say it will be soon.
Lovingly,
Leila
Artwork by Clare Elsaesser all rights reserved
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